KARAOKE RECAP: THURSDAY, DECEMBER 30, MUTZ, 5 SONGS

NEW--Heart-Shaped Box--Nirvana--I'd been putting it off for a couple weeks.
NEW--Cruisin'--Huey Lewis & Gwyneth Paltrow--A duet: Tina & Czarnina! Stole it from Doug. Nailed, like, 95% of it.
1979--Smashing Pumpkins--Decided to do 'year' songs for New Year's.
1985--Bowling For Soup--Ouch. Now I remember why I shelved this a month ago.
Fake Plastic Trees--Radiohead--Really nailing it now. And good crowd response.

PS: The two new songs brought my grand total to 250! Round numbers, you gotta love 'em.

KARAOKE RECAP: WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 29, CENTER COURT, 2 SONGS

Suck On My Cock--John Valby--It's SOOOOO last week, but 'twas a request, by a woman who thought it was too good for me to have written it. Uh huh.
NEW--Vincent--Don McLean--Heard it in the grocery store that morning, had it stuck in my head all fucking day. Only one way to get it out. I was not happy with it. The timing is very tricky.

KARAOKE RECAPS:

WEDNESDAY, DEC. 22, CENTER COURT, 3 SONGS

Marijuanaville--David Allan Coe--Going for the funny tonight.
Are You Lonesome Tonight--Sam Kinison--Very well-received.
Suck On My Cock--John Valby--And of course they dig this too.

THURSDAY, DEC. 23, MUTZ, 3 SONGS

Mexican Radio--Wall Of Voodoo
Fake Plastic Trees--Radiohead--I was right. 2nd time...nailed it.
Not For You--Pearl Jam

FASCIST PIG OF THE YEAR

Congrats to George W. Bush on being named Time Magazine's "Person Of The Year". WTG, Dubya, you are now in appropriate company. Namely, Hitler and the Ayatollah. Both role models of yours, no doubt.

KARAOKE RECAP: MONDAY, DEC. 20, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 4 SONGS

NEW--Fake Plastic Trees--Radiohead--Was compelled to try it. Dunno why. Coulda gone an octave lower, but I just get tired of myself and my EVV sometimes. So I took a chance and went high where the real vocal is. Voice cracked once or twice where it shouldn't, but otherwise I did good. I think next shot at this I'll nail it.
My Way--Frank Sinatra--Duet with Sir Bob ("My liege!"). Gave him the low verses while me and my EVV took the high bridges. He didn't think he could do it, but he did damn good. Face it, Sinatra's singing skills are overrated.
Here Comes The Sun--The Beatles--To mark the winter solstice. Last week I woulda had to change it to "There Goes The Sun".
Dixie Rose Deluxe's...--Trent Willmon--It was this or "Tuesday's Gone". This was shorter and I had to leave for work. Can still nail it without looking at the words.

KARAOKE RECAP: SATURDAY, DEC. 18, MUTZ, 6 SONGS

NEW--AM Radio--Everclear
Love Shack--The B-52's--Duet with Sam. He did the female vocals. Would you believe this was his idea, not mine? Of course, my Fred Schneider voice is much better. As for Sam, he couldn't quite settle on a voice. Kept switching between Joe Cocker, Prince and Lisa Loeb.
You Don't Love Me Anymore--Weird Al Yankovic
NEW--Old Apartment--Barenaked Ladies
Suck On My Cock--John Valby--Very well-received. So naturally I was told I can't sing it anymore.
Walkin' 'Round In Women's Underwear--Bob Rivers--Duet with Sam. Not bad when you consider Sam was drunk off his ass.

KARAOKE RECAPS (DEC 8-15)

Note: Got to catch up on recaps. So here's the current backlog. From now on, I'll try my best to post each appearance individually.

WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 8, CENTER COURT, 4 SONGS

And the addiction begins to take a stranglehold on me. Added Wednesday to the sked. Only had time for 1 song last week ("Marijuanaville" [see footnote], forgot to add it to last week's recap. Short-term memory failure!), but this week I got there earlier.

NEW--Slither--Velvet Revolver--Doug paid $20 to get this for me, and says I damn well better sing it. So this was a chance to practice it.
If I Had $1,000,000--Barenaked Ladies--Someone else did this so I offered to do the 2nd vocal part.
Outside--Aaron Lewis & Fred Durst--Turned out to be some fucked up shortened version, so I'm not even counting it.
Fuck It--Eamon--Not really in my range, by the end I had to do a Frankie Valli voice to stay in key. ("Fuck what I said, it don't mean shit now...Sheeeeerrrrrry baaaaabyyyyy!") Odd.
NEW--Drinkin' Bone--Tracy Byrd--Been planning on stealing this from Doug for weeks. Chance to practice. Piece o' cake. Muwahahahaaa!

[Footnote: Due to my strong personal beliefs, I wish to stress that my performance of the song "Marijuanaville" in no way endorses the activities described therein.]

Note: I passed on Jalapeno's Friday. Too tired, and too far to get home. Besides, Friday night is ALF's Hit Talk Show night!

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 11, MUTZ, 4 SONGS
Drinkin' Bone--Tracy Byrd--Time to piss Doug off and officially steal it. Someone told me later that I did it better. Muwahahahaaa!
Slither--Velvet Revolver--Time to appease Doug by giving him his 20 bucks worth.
Float On--Modest Mouse--Dancin' Sarah returned this week, she usually sings this, but never heard me do it.
NEW--The Distance--Cake--Finally got around to this one. Was inspired by the Earnhardt movie playing on the telly.

MONDAY, DECEMBER 13, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 2 SONGS

Insensitive--Jann Arden--Decided to play nice.
NEW--Cumbersome--Seven Mary Three--Heard it at CC, thot I'd try it. Not bad.

WEDNESDAY, DEMCMBER 15, CENTER COURT, 3 SONGS
Take Me Out--Franz Ferdinand--Making this one my own.
Float On--Modest Mouse--I really like the parts where I'm actually supposed to let my voice crack. Takes SO much pressure off.
Suck On My Cock--John Valby--Had to practice it for Saturday. Or just in case they don't let me do it Saturday. At least I can do it at CC, the crowd there loved it.

Note: Passed on Jalapeno's again. See previous note.

I COULD BE ALL CHEERFUL, BUT I'D STILL HAVE TO BUM RIDES OFF PEOPLE

Normally I try to keep the Pond an Xmas-free zone, but if I were ever to sing a holiday song at karaoke, it'd be this one. Sadly, Premiere Karaoke doesn't have the original (yet). It's a parody of "God" by John Lennon, called "Santa". The other day Steve Dahl played it as recorded by Jay Goeppner, formerly of the Beatle Brothers. To hear it go to dahl.com, then "recent shows", then select Monday (Dec. 13) and go about 1:33:33 into the show. Or you can be a lazy ass and just read the lyrics below. I recommend listening to it, because Goeppner does the best John Lennon imitation since...well, since Julian Lennon.

"Santa"
Santa's a concept
By which we commercialize
The holiday
I'll say it again
Santa's a concept
By which we commercialize
The holiday
I don't believe in Rudolph
I don't believe in Frosty
I don't believe in sleigh rides
I don't believe in Tiny Tim
I don't believe in Nutcracker
I don't believe in 34th Street
I don't believe in decking the halls
I don't believe in elves
I don't believe in mistletoe
I don't believe in Jingle Bells
I don't believe in eggnog
I don't believe in Jack Frost
I don't believe in George Bailey
I don't believe in Tannenbaums
I don't believe in Christmas songs
I just believe in peace
Peace throughout the year
Holiday cheer
The holiday is over
What can I say?
The holiday is over
Like any other day
I was excited once
But now I am not
I was all cheerful
But now I'm shot
And so dear friends
We've got 12 more months left to shop
The holiday is over

BUZZ KILMAN'S TOP TEN BEST BAND NAMES OF 2004

At the time of this writing, this list was not posted on Buzz's page, so here ya go!

10. Bunny Brains
9. Two-Cow Garage
8. Quarter-Barrel Cheryl
7. Attila The Stockbroker
6. Flabby Hoffman
5. Toast Face
4. The Well-Hungarians
3. The Flying Hamsters Of Doom
2. Think Floyd

And Buzz Kilman's choice for best band name of 2004...

1. Bad Haggis

~~~~~~~~~~

PS: The Weekly Karaoke Recap is being retooled. Since I now karaoke up to 4 times a week (yes, I freely admit, my addiction has consumed me), my karaoke recaps will now be split up into individual days, and will be posted (en masse if need be) whenever I get around to it.

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP

FRIDAY, JALAPENO'S, 2 SONGS

Insensitive--Jann Arden--Fittingly sad, of course. "I fell too fast, I feel too much..." No shit, Sure-lick.
Runaway Train--Soul Asylum--Another sad song, but this one I had to do simply because Steve Dahl played it a few days before, and when I get a song stuck in my head like that there's only one thing to do. (Before it vanishes, I highly recommend listening to last Wednesday's Dahl show, about 3 hours 20 minutes in. Steve does an acoustic version of the song with Dave Pirner of Soul Asylum. Very funny and very good.)

SATURDAY, MUTZ, 4 SONGS

Took my new lady friend to karaoke for a second time. The first time I strayed from my A material, thus she wasn't overly impressed, so this time I wanted to bring out at least one or two of my big guns.

Walkin' Round In Women's Underwear--Bob Rivers--A December must-sing.
Outside--Staind--Went back to the original for the first time in a long time. I wanted to belt it out. I think lady friend was impressed.
What's New Pussycat--Tom Jones--One for lady friend. Hope I didn't embarrass you, dear.
You Don't Love Me Anymore--Weird Al Yankovic--She left early, so I was free to work the ladies in the crowd. (I know, I'm a scumbag.) Toward the end some guy nearby was not quite heckling but just being kinda loud and obnoxious, so he became the last line target. Also I added to my primal scream on the last note by collapsing onto the floor. Hey, it was a long and eventful night.

MONDAY, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 2 SONGS

Runaway Train--Soul Asylum--This was still stuck in my head so I kicked things off with it.
Walkin' Round In Women's Underwear--Bob Rivers--Tis the season. Whatever.

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP (NOVEMBER 27-29)

Very truncated week. I would have gone to Mutz Thursday but they were closed. Friday I was too tired to have to bike home from Jalapeno's, so I stayed home, watched my CBC shows, then ALF's Hit Talk Show, then passed out to rest up for Saturday.

SATURDAY, MUTZ, 2 SONGS
Ran the show. 45 singers. Once I got past an initial technical problem, things ran smoothly.

Outside (live acoustic version)--Aaron Lewis & Fred Durst--Was a little rattled from the tech snafu, and it showed. Kinda shaky.
Hunger Strike--Temple Of The Dog--Talked comrade Jason into doing the Chris Cornell part. Started a bit iffy but finished strong.

MONDAY, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 3 SONGS
Bizarro week: Got more songs in Monday than Saturday.

Hurt--Johnny Cash--A slow one to start. It was in my head as I walked there.
Walkin' 'Round In Women's Underwear--Bob Rivers--Tis the season. After this past Halloween, this song takes on a whole new meaning for me! Usually a duet with Doug but he made me go solo this time.
Amber--311--Came up on the in-between rotation, you know how it is. I'm still not happy with it but it's still better than my other 311 attempts.

BEST BAND NAMES PLAYING THE TOLEDO AREA THIS WEEK (NOV 26-DEC 2)

Ten Inch Willy--tonight & Saturday at Lucky Louie's
Froghead--tonight & Saturday at M.T. Loonies
Commander Cody And His Lost Planet Airmen (of "Hot Rod Lincoln" fame)--Sunday at Magic Bag
A Modest Proposal--Saturday at Mickey Finn's Pub
Fate Of Apollo--Saturday at Mickey Finn's Pub
Fifth Floor--tonight at Sports Zone
Hot Karl--tonight at Sports Zone
Static Rituals--Saturday at Underground
Clean Car--Saturday at Underground

TURKEY DAY

Hey all you turkeys, it's Thanksgiving Day (Oh shit, why did I have to type that? "Thanksgiving Day." Brings back traumatic memories of that TV movie with Mary Tyler Moore and Jonathon Brandmeier. Shudder.), and here's how I play it...

Thanks to everyone reading this for reading this, especially those who do so on a regular basis. And especially to my friends who read this, thanks for being a part of my life!

Everybody enjoy your feast today (even if it includes low-carb stuffing), and here's to loading ourselves up on enough L-triptophan to knock us all on our sorry Thanksgiving asses!

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP (NOV 19-22)

Ouch. Short week. Only 11 songs total. I used to could do almost twice that at Mugzie's. :(

FRIDAY, JALAPENO'S, 4 SONGS

Away From The Sun--3 Doors Down, Daughter--Pearl Jam, Just A Gigolo--David Lee Roth, Mother--Pink Floyd
Yes, I know. I didn't notice it until I got home: I did "Mother" and "Daughter". Weird. Anyway, twas a bit of an off night for me. Missy came along, she wanted me to do "Mr. Roboto" but she was set on leaving around 12 so I never got to it, nor did I get to try working the room with "You Don't Love Me Anymore". Worst part was seeing that they built a DJ cage which cut the size of the stage in freakin' half! Plus you can't see the singer from where we sat! SUCKS!

SATURDAY, MUTZ, 5 SONGS

Turn The Page--Bob Seger, NEW--Insensitive--Jann Arden, Oh Pretty Woman--Roy Orbison, You Don't Love Me Anymore--Weird Al Yankovic, You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin'--The Righteous Brothers
Jann Arden was on "Rick Mercer's Monday Report" last week, and looking way hot. (She's kinda got "The Build"...yummmmmy) Looked her up on Bearshare Saturday morning, found "Insensitive" and started practicing it. Had to use the EVV but not bad. Other than that, obviously I stuck to my aces. Seger I'm nailing, Orbison I'm nailing, and of course worked the crowd very well with the Weird Al. Last line target this week: Lester. (PS: Forgot I did the Righteous Bros as a duet with Fat Bastard.)

MONDAY, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 2 SONGS

One More Minute--Weird Al Yankovic, Outside (acoustic version)--Aaron Lewis & Fred Durst
Stuck to the aces again in case I was being scouted. A good night, nailed 'em both perhaps the best I've ever nailed 'em. Now, if I had had enough time, I would have done either "Oh Pretty Woman" or "One Thing" third, which would have made it three "O" songs on the night for a tic-tac-toe. Alas it was not to be. (Mind you, normally I like to be X, but there's only 2 "X" songs in the book.)

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP (NOVEMBER 12-15)

FRIDAY, MUGZIE'S, 11 SONGS

Babylon--David Gray--They like me to start out with a slow song...
Daysleeper--R.E.M.--...I couldn't decide between 3 slow songs...
NEW--No One Is To Blame--Howard Jones--...so I did all 3. My high mid-range worked well throughout.
NEW--Mexican Radio--Wall Of Voodoo--Steve Dahl did his show from Mexico this week, so I've had this song in my head all week even though they didn't play it, which I still can't believe.
1985--Bowling For Soup--Ahh, that delightful light-headed feeling. But actually, I'm starting to kinda suck at this one. I might have to shelve it.
Take Me Out--Franz Ferdinand--This one, however, I am absolutely nailing.
One More Minute--Weird Al Yankovic--Micki requested it. Again. Well received.
NEW--Bad To The Bone--George Thorogood--Nailed it. Sent it out to my gal Christine.
She Drives Like Crazy--Weird Al Yankovic--Every time Doug does the original, I have to follow it with this. I didn't even want to. It's so Pavlovian.
Dixie Rose Deluxe's Honky Tonk, Feed Store, Gun Shop, Used Car, Beer, Bait, BBQ, Barber Shop, Laundromat--Trent Willmon--Seems so easy to sing now. Then again, it IS country.
NEW--Don't Change--INXS--Had a good voice this night, so I went for another high mid-range. Not bad at all.

Unfortunately, on a night when my voice was in top form, since it was only Doug and me singing for two hours (again), and despite my begging them to continue, they decided to pack it in early. D'OH! Also it looks like this was the swan song for karaoke at Mugzie's. R.I.P. (But at least this will free up my Friday nights so I can watch ALF's Hit Talk Show.)

SATURDAY, MUTZ, 5 SONGS

It's No Good--Arthur Kill/Depeche Mode--My AK/DM hybrid version.
I Believe In A Thing Called Love--The Darkness--Made it work as a duet with another singer.
My Way--Frank Sinatra--Believe me, I wanted to try this in a Sinatra/Matt Dusk voice, but my EVV (Eddie Vedder voice) took over again. It can't be stopped!
Take Me Out--Franz Ferdinand--I kick ass on this song.
Don't Know What You Got--Cinderella--The EVV worked very well on it.

MONDAY, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 3 SONGS
Something About You--Level 42--Heard it on the radio, had to try it. Needs work but not bad.
It's Been Awhile--Staind--Working very well except I gotta get used to the necessary breathing pattern.
You Don't Love Me Anymore--Weird Al Yankovic--Whereas Mugzie's is too big a room and Mutz is just right, the SL room is too small. Had to linger just a bit longer on each victim. Instead of singing the last line to Doug, this time I targeted Sir Bob (aka "My liege!"). Poor guy.

Notes: With Mugzie's falling by the wayside, I'll have to wait and see if they find another Friday gig for me to run. In the meantime, they have tapped me to run the Mutz show November 27!

THE IDEA POSTED HERE BELONGS TO ME. NO STEALING IT! YOU HEAR ME?

I have a dream. Someday I hope to start a chain of restaurants to directly compete with Hooters. Instead of featuring waitresses with big breasts, mine will feature waitresses with big beautiful bubble butts. And it shall be called...Mud Flaps!

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP (NOVEMBER 5-8)

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 5, MUGZIE'S, 16 SONGS
NEW--North Of The Border--Eggs Danny Thomas Style--Written after the Election Day travesty. The premise being that if I had the necessary resources, I'd move to Canada faster than you can say Saskatchewan, but for now I can dream. But as I began to explain the premise of the song, Micki shut my mic off, so I was not able to give it the proper set-up. Plus it was in a bad key. Anyhoo, the lyrics are at the bottom of this post.
NEW--Imagine--John Lennon--I figured if I can't say it, I'll sing it. My mic was left on this time. Did good.
Behind Blue Eyes--The Who--Took forever to get a drink, ended up singing this with a dry throat. Not good.
Float On--Modest Mouse--Decided to stick to my A material, in case any bands were scouting me incognito.
One More Minute--Weird Al Yankovic--Requested by one of the barmaids.
Hurt--Johnny Cash--Starting to seem too low!
It's Been Awhile--Staind--Getting really good at this one, nice compliment to "Outside".
NEW--My Way--Frank Sinatra--Requested by another of the barmaids. Decided to throw caution to the wind. Ended up sounding like Rat Pack meets Grunge. You know me, when in doubt, fall back on the Eddie Vedder voice! So if Pearl Jam did this song, I think it would sound damn good. I got mucho props.
Margaritaville--Jimmy Buffett--Yeah, I know, someday I'll learn more Buffett.
NEW--The Closer I Get To You--Roberta Flack & Donny Hathaway--Duet with Tina. She asked me to learn it a couple of weeks ago. I didn't really, but there's room to improvise a bit, so it went well.
Oh Pretty Woman--Roy Orbison--Really nailing this one lately.
Outside--Aaron Lewis & Fred Durst--Had to whip out my ace.
NEW--Lady--Styx--Actually Tina did this one, but I threw in some low harmony. Not bad.
You Don't Love Me Anymore--Weird Al Yankovic--Fun to work the ladies in the crowd, but Mugzie's is too big a room. Almost have to run across the room at times.
NEW--Don't Go Breaking My Heart--Elton John & Kiki Dee--Duet with Tina. Higher than my other Elton stuff, so not as good as I'd like.
Take Me Out--Franz Ferdinand--I'm nailing it.
NEW--Fall To Pieces--Velvet Revolver--Tina's friend sang it, but again I tossed in some low harmony. Will need to bump it down a key or three if I try it myself.

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 6, MUTZ, 6 SONGS
NEW--Time In A Bottle--Jim Croce--Nailed it, but it's a hell of a lot shorter song than I remember.
1985--Bowling For Soup--Tough to breathe through it, but I'm getting better. (Actually I get kinda light-headed by the end, which sometimes is quite enjoyable.)
Turn The Page--Bob Seger--Nailed it. (Friday night while D&M were packing up, this came on the jukebox. Tina and her friend and I sang along in sort-of three-part harmony, I guess as an encore.)
Take Me Out--Franz Ferdinand--Not only am I nailing it, I really enjoy it and really get into it.
You Don't Love Me Anymore--Weird Al Yankovic--Finally I got around to working the Mutz crowd with this one. Smaller room, works much better. Gotta do it more often.
Broken--Seether (with Amy Lee)--Duet with Bev. She was rather drunk, but even when she's bad, she's good. Raves all around. (Score: Bev 3, certain person 1.)

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 8, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 2 SONGS
North Of The Border--Eggs Danny Thomas Style--Got to explain the premise this time. Much more well-received with the proper set-up. Also tried a different key which worked better. Still tough to stay in sync with the music though.
Brown Eyed Girl--Van Morrison--Wanted to brush up on it, just in case.

"North Of The Border" by Eggs Danny Thomas Style
Parody of "Over The Rainbow", music/lyrics by Arlen and Harburg
Parody lyrics by D. Pribe and W. Rose

Somewhere north of the border, I can see
There's a land that I learned of thanks to the CBC
Somewhere north of the border, beer is blue
And the dreams that I dare to dream maybe will come true
I'll wish upon a maple leaf and all these redneck Yanks I'll leave behind me
Where snowflakes fall like hockey pucks and people know that Dubya sucks
That's where you'll find me
Somewhere north of the border, geese do fly
Geese fly north of the border, why then oh why can't I?
If happy Canada geese fly north of the border
Why oh why can't I?

--Copyright 2004 by Ducksoup

DUCKSOUP'S TOP 50 SONGS OF THE MONTH (OCTOBER 2004)

1. Everybody's Changing--Keane
2. Take Me Out--Franz Ferdinand
3. Thumbing My Way--Pearl Jam
4. She's So High--Tal Bachman
5. Creep--Richard Cheese
6. SupaDubya--4o. del Tren
7. Chicken Out--Gomez
8. Move On--Jet
9. Float On--Modest Mouse
10. Staring At The Sun--Simple Kid
11. Nothing Is Wrong--Gomez
12. Sweet Transvestite--Tim Curry
13. 1985--Bowling For Soup
14. Drugs--Simple Kid
15. Where Ya Going--Gomez
16. Quinn The Quarterback--Steve Dahl
17. Breakups Breakdowns--Simple Kid
18. It's Been Awhile--Staind
20. It's No Good--Depeche Mode
21. Silence--Gomez
23. On Top Of You--Trey Parker
24. All Things--Widelife
25. Mad World--Michael Andrews feat. Gary Jules
26. The Long Road--Pearl Jam (with Neil Young)
27. Fat Bottomed Girls--Hayseed Dixie
28. Trouble--Cat Stevens
29. Average Man--Simple Kid
30. We Like To Party--Vengaboys
31. Dixie Rose Deluxe's...--Trent Willmon
32. Rockin' In The Free World--Neil Young & Pearl Jam
33. Hello--Simple Kid
34. My Happy Ending--Avril Lavigne
35. Aint Talkin Bout Love--Dirty Power
36. Are You Lonesome Tonight--Sam Kinison
37. Truck On--Simple Kid
38. Milkshake--Richard Cheese
39. I Hold Your Hand In Mine--Tom Lehrer
40. The Lunatics...--Fun Boy Three
41. Krenzel Logic--Steve Dahl
42. I've Been Everywhere--Hank Snow
43. Do One--Gomez
44. Buddy Holly--Richard Cheese
45. Beat Me--Custom
46. Tuesday's Gone--Lynyrd Skynyrd
47. Given To Fly--Pearl Jam
48. I Miss You--Blink 182
49. Gonna Be Some Changes Made--Bruce Hornsby
50. Quinn The Quarterback--Uncle Boogie Pants

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP (OCT 29-NOV 1)

Ahh, Halloween weekend. Time to play dress-up. Unfortunately, I experienced a slight wardrobe malfunction. The rubber band on my ALF mask broke. So I had to go to Plan B, a.k.a. Operation Dr. Frank N. Ducksoup. As you'll read below, this was no wardrobe malfunction! Muwahahahahahaaaaa!

FRIDAY, OCTOBER 29, MUGZIE'S, 14 SONGS
NEW--Take Me Out--Franz Ferdinand--D&M found this one for me and it worked so well that I actually did it a second time at the end of the night.
Mad World--Michael Andrews featuring Gary Jules--Something slow to start with.
The Scientist--Coldplay--Another slow one. Did it better months ago.
1985--Bowling For Soup--It's all over the radio, and it's fun to sing.
NEW--Creatures (For A While)--311--Better than the last 311 song I did, but still for some reason those are giving me problems.
NEW--Word Up--Cameo--Not the new KoRn version, but close enough for jazz. First two-thirds went okay, the rest...bleh.
NEW--Monster Mash--Bobby "Boris" Pickett--Time to try out some Halloween stuff. Did okay, but the crowd sucked.
NEW--Purple People Eater--Sheb Wooley--Same here. But had to warm them up for my big number...
NEW--Sweet Transvestite--Tim Curry--Complete with dress, wig, lipstick and fishnets. I nailed it. The mic stand, that is. I used a bedsheet in place of a cape for the reveal, and when I threw it off I knocked over D&M's mic stand behind me. Overall, a mixed reception, as expected. During later songs a guy threw a couple of lemon wedges at me. Not sure how I should take that.
NEW--Werewolves Of London--Warren Zevon--Changed out of drag, but the crowd was still...um, iffy. Easy to sing. Too easy. But you gotta love the "bip" near the end.
NEW--I Love The Dead--Alice Cooper--Another mixed reception. Easy to forget how ahead of its time this song was. But I liked it enough to repeat it at Mutz.
NEW--Voodoo--Godsmack--Got the voice nailed, but tough to breathe right during it. Better reception than the others songs, oddly enough.
You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin'--The Righteous Brothers--Duet with Doug. Tried to switch all our parts from last time. I assigned the harmony parts to him, but he wasn't prepared for it. Plus he had mic probs. Guess we'd better switch back in future.
Float On--Modest Mouse--I think the chicks dig this one, so I'm doing it a lot lately.

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 30, MUTZ, 6 SONGS

NEW--Don't Fear The Reaper--Blue Oyster Cult--"Guess what? I got a fever! And the only prescription...is MORE COWBELL!"
Aint Talkin Bout Love--Dirty Power/Van Halen--Because I was wearing my Dirty Power shirt. It's a vocal workout, but I like it.
I Hold Your Hand In Mine--Tom Lehrer--D&M let me get away with it again. Went over better than last Monday. Made it a 2-fer with the next song...
Attack Of The Killer Tomatoes--Lewis Lee--They found this one just for me, so I felt an obligation. A good set-up for the biggie...
Sweet Transvestite--Tim Curry--I managed to not hit the mic stand this time. As expected, a much better reception than at Mugzie's. The Mutz crowd ate it up. NOTE: D&M got pictures, hopefully I will be able to post them here at the Pond very soon. I looked fabulous! Wait til you folks see me in fishnets. With all the walking I do, my gams are positively delicious, if I do say so meself.
I Love The Dead--Alice Cooper--Ended the night with it. Got Sam and a few others to sing along. Unlike Friday, I stayed in drag for this one. After all, it IS Alice.

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 1, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 2 SONGS

NEW--Long Time--Boston--Did it as a salute to the Red Sox. But the Eddie Vedder voice doesn't work well with a Boston song. Thud.
NEW--Centerfold--J. Geils Band--Vocal range was okay. But tougher to sing than I thought. Breathing was tricky. And it needs the right crowd to join in on the na-na's.

PS: I sit corrected. "I've Been Everywhere" by Hank Snow is NOT the ultimate karaoke challenge. The ultimate karaoke challenge is "Life Is A Rock (But The Radio Rolled Me)" by Reunion. But I'm not even close to trying that!

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP (OCT 22-25)

Had to skip Mutz last week, so this edition's just a tad truncated.

FRIDAY, OCTOBER 22, MUGZIE'S, 16 SONGS

NEW--Beyond The Gray Sky--311--I'm stupid. I forgot how the song goes. Then again, as Steve Dahl would say, "Set the bar low and then keep jumping over it."
NEW--Midnight Confessions--The Grass Roots--Oldie but a goodie. Decided to have one of my cherry-oke popping fests.
NEW--Under My Wheels--Alice Cooper--One of the driving songs I picked out after the JA Grand Prix.
NEW--Brick--Ben Folds Five--Not bad. It's either really low or really high. Both of which I can handle.
NEW--Drive--Incubus--And that completes my "Drive" trilogy, along with "Drive" by the Cars and "Drive" by R.E.M. My mid-range served me well.
Gonna Be Some Changes Made--Bruce Hornsby--Had to try it again. Damn shortened version. Not easy.
NEW--A Hard Day's Night--The Beatles--Heard someone else do it weeks ago, it's in a lower key than the original, low enough that I did okay.
Hole Hearted--Extreme--In my range, but tough to breathe through.
NEW--I Drink Alone--George Thorogood--Kept my Smirnoff Twisted in hand as I sang. Changed the last verse: "Well I had some fun with a lady friend | But then she up and ran off | So now I spend my weekends | With my pal Pierre Smirnoff | And we drink alone..."
NEW--You Don't Bring Me Flowers--Neil Diamond & Barbra Streisand--Duet with Tina. My Neil is right on, Tina's Barbra is right on. Not bad.
It's Been Awhile--Staind--With my mid-range clicking, I can now throw this into the mix with "Outside" for some Staind variety. As for "So Far Away" and "Fade"...those both scare me.

(Now, before we move on, I must warn you: Prepare to be shocked and stunned. Hell hath frozen over. Are you all sitting down?)

NEW--Picture--Kid Rock & Sheyrl Crow--Yes, I know. You must all be flabbergasted. But I knew Tina could do her part well, and since Kid Rock can't actually sing, my part was way easy. For once this song didn't suck at karaoke. But still I felt kinda stupid. Not to mention more than a tad ashamed. But it's one more tune under my belt. Besides, shocking people is what I do. Fuck, I even shocked myself this time. Hey, gotta do the unexpected now and then, keep you folks on your toes. What will I do next? "Heart Of Glass"? "Redneck Woman"? "Quando Quando Quando"? You just never know!
NEW--Me And You And A Dog Named Boo--Lobo--Perfectly in my range. Nailed it.
One More Minute--Weird Al Yankovic--More women in the crowd than last week. Went okay. However, the more I thought about it...
You Don't Love Me Anymore--Weird Al Yankovic--...the more I realized this one would be even better to work the female part of the crowd with. And it was. The room's too big though. Can't wait to work the crowd at Mutz with it.
She's So High--Tal Bachman--Getting better at it. Needs a little more work. I want to keep this in my regular rotation.

MONDAY, OCTOBER 25, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 4 SONGS
NEW--I Hold Your Hand In Mine--Tom Lehrer--I got away with my a capella Halloween tune. Not a lot of people there though, so it kinda fell on deaf ears.
Surrender--Cheap Trick--I somehow managed to not sound like Neil Diamond this time.
NEW--Big Ten Inch--Aerosmith--Was in a playful mood. Predictably I caught some ribbing from D&M.
NEW--Punk Rock Girl--The Dead Milkmen--Playful again. Fun one to do, but I flubbed a couple of lines.

Coming up: Halloween weekend. Gonna hafta do "Monster Mash", "Purple People Eater", whatever other Halloween songs I can think of. Saturday at Mutz could get interesting, what with costumes and all. Perhaps I'll be performing "Sweet Transvestite"? Be afraid. Be very afraid.