My mom would have been 66 today, so not much to say beyond that, although I did see that it's also Tom Green's birthday. Maybe that explains why she actually liked his show. But more on that in my post on the "50 Worst Shows" list, which will be here within the next day or two.

But for today, we pause, and remember...and perhaps, if you listen carefully, you'll hear a distant call from beyond...

"DOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!"

I'M CURRENTLY SUFFERING FROM DEPRESSION...

Specifically, a tropical depression. Yes, it saddens me to report that The Artist Formerly Known As Hurricane Douglas has been downgraded and is weakening. Son of a dog shit sandwich! I had to wait 37+ years for my own hurricane, now I suppose I gotta hang around until I'm 74 for the next one. Perhaps by then I'll be retired and living in Florida. And maybe, just maybe, I could be killed by my own hurricane. "Hey Doug, see that hurricane out there?" one of you will say, "It's got your name all over it! You're screwed! Been nice knowing ya."

Makes you think, doesn't it? How many guys named Andrew, for example, were done in by Hurricane Andrew? Well, I guess everyone would remember how you died. And how many babies born in Florida since then have been named Andrew? Any at all? I would think some parent would be defiant enough to do that. After all, I think they retire the names of all the really big killer hurricanes, sort of like jersey numbers. So all those new little Andys should be safe from that scenario.

Which brings me to the irrational fear that Degauss has about Lake Shore Drive in Chicago. He was in an accident there once, and is afraid it would happen again. But 'Gaussie, dude, think of the odds against you being in a second accident on LSD (the road, not the drug). If you were to be in another accident the next time you go to Chicago, odds are it will be on a different street. LSD will be the safest place for you! It's like the scene in "World According To Garp" where Garp and his wife are looking at a house to buy, and a plane crashes into the side of the house. So Garp says "We'll take it," for the perfectly logical reason that the odds of another plane hitting the house are astronomical. "It's been pre-disastered! We'll be safe here." Makes sense to me.

ROCK YOU LIKE A...ME?

I've got good news and bad news. The good news: It's official...I FINALLY HAVE A HURRICANE NAMED AFTER ME! The bad news: It isn't expected to make any landfall. Dammit! Even when I get what I want, I don't get what I want. I wanted a hurricane I could root for as it destroyed homes and took lives. I wanted to be able to say about my 'cane, "It's black and demonic and it spreads darkness and death...cool!" But nooooo...

WE KNOW A REMOTE FARM IN LINCOLNSHIRE, WHERE MRS. BUCKLEY LIVES. EVERY JULY, PEAS GROW THERE...
by Ducksoup

First off, thank you Shaggy, you sneaky bastid. I've been looking for a suitable place to compile all my frequently-used links, and fortunately I was able to find where you added the link to Shagout and add more.

On last Friday's Dahl show, The Stever played the tape of the infamous Orson Welles commercial voiceover session, which was the basis for Pinky And The Brain, who later recreated the Welles voiceover session on the show. You can check it out using the handy-dandy link I've added on the left. Here's the time codes:

1:06:52 to 1:08:28, the original Orson Welles tape
1:18:16 to 1:20:48, the Pinky And The Brain version (preceded by an explanation by Steve)

Note: For those who have never heard it, toward the end of the Welles tape they had to bleep out the phrase "go down on you". In the P&B version they changed that part to "make cheese for you". Perhaps "make cheese for you" could become a new slang term for oral sex.

PS: My take on the "50 Worst Shows" list is still in the works, so stay tuned.

CROSS-PROMOTION
by Shaggy

See how that works? I link you, you link me. Yase.