MR. COLOREDWELL'S WEEKLY SPORTS FASHION REPORT

"Uh, yes I'm the Devil, why do think I'm all red?"--from a Whitest Kids U'Know sketch

I've been seeing red all week. Most of it good. Who does red right? Well, the Red Wings, natch; the New Jersey Devils (hence the quote above); the 49ers; the Texans, who went all red Monday night; and the Chiefs, whom I'd LOVE to see do all red. Honorable mention for the Navy football team's cute red belts. Who does red wrong? The Arizona Cardinals, who look like retards in leotards. Especially disturbing is WR Larry Fitzgerald who, seriously, looks like a girl, specifically a Jamaican pilates instructor with a hair weave! Eeww! Girl legs, girl butt...CREE-PY!

Other notes this week: the Delaware Blue Hens wear an exact copy of Michigan's helmets. WHY? What is wrong with you?
I'm starting to like the Dolphins' shiny aqua pants...they even stay shiny in the rain!
And no matter where they play, the Vikings look like crap. At least Brett Favre kept up the motif...his hand was even more purple than the uniforms! Wait, are we sure that was his HAND???

Coming up next week: the Bowl season begins!

2010 NATIONAL FASHION LEAGUE STANDINGS AS OF DEC 15
TEAM W-L WEEK-BY-WEEK
Chicago Bears 13-0 -wwwwwww-wwwwww
Green Bay Packers 13-0 -wwwwwwwww-wwww
Pittsburgh Steelers 12-1 -wwww-wwwwwwlww
Washington Redskins 11-2 -wwwwlwlw-wwwww
New Orleans Saints 11-2 -wwwwwwwlw-wlww
San Francisco 49ers 11-2 -lwwwwwww-wwwlw
Kansas City Chiefs 11-3 -wwwllwwwlwwwww
Indianapolis Colts 10-3 -wwlwwl-wwwwwlw
New York Giants 10-3 -wlwwwwl-wwwwlw
Dallas Cowboys 11-4 wlwwlwwwwllwwww
Cleveland Browns 9-4 -lwwlwll-wwwwww
Oakland Raiders 9-4 -wllwwlwww-lwww
St Louis Rams 9-4 -wlwwwlww-lwwwl
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 9-5 -wlwwwllwwwlwwl
New York Jets 8-5 -lwlwww-lwlwwwl
Miami Dolphins 7-6 -lwww-llwwwlllw
Buffalo Bills 7-6 -llwlw-wllwwwwl
Houston Texans 6-7 -wlllll-lwwlwww
Carolina Panthers 5-8 -wlwll-llllwlww
Tennessee Titans 4-9 -lwlllwwl-lllwl
San Diego Chargers 4-9 -lllllwwwl-wlll
Atlanta Falcons 4-9 -lwlwllw-lwllll
Seattle Seahawks 4-9 -wlwl-lwllwllll
Detroit Lions 3-10 -lwlwll-llllwll
Philadelphia Eagles 3-10 -wwlllwl-llllll
New England Patriots 2-11 -llll-wlwllllll
Minnesota Vikings 2-12 -lllwllllwlllll
Arizona Cardinals 1-12 -lllll-lllllllw
Baltimore Ravens 1-12 -llllwll-llllll
Denver Broncos 1-12 -wlllllll-lllll
Jacksonville Jaguars 0-13 -llllllll-lllll
Cincinnati Bengals 0-14 llllll-llllllll

2010 FASHION BOWL SUBDIVISION STANDINGS AS OF DEC 15
TEAM (BRAND) W-L WEEK-BY-WEEK (NOTE: B DENOTES TEAM HAS A BOWL GAME TO PLAY)
Iowa (Nike) 11-0 wwwwwwwwwww B
Nebraska (Adidas) 9-0 wwwwwwwww B
Tennessee (Adidas) 8-0 wwwwwwww B
Pittsburgh (Nike) 7-0 wwwwwww B
Kent State (Nike) 5-0 wwwww
Syracuse (Nike) 5-0 wwwww B
Fresno State (Nike) 4-0 wwww B
Louisville (Adidas) 4-0 wwww B
Duke (Nike) 3-0 www
Florida Atlantic (Adidas) 3-0 www
SMU (Adidas) 3-0 www B
East Carolina (Nike) 2-0 ww B
Washington State (Nike) 2-0 ww
Idaho (Nike) 1-0 w
Louisiana Tech (Nike) 1-0 w
Memphis (Nike) 1-0 w
Rice (Nike) 1-0 w
Tulane (Nike) 1-0 w
Western Kentucky (Russell) 1-0 w
Ohio State (Nike) 11-1 wwwwwwwwwwlw B
UCLA (Adidas) 10-1 lwwwwwwwwww
Oklahoma (Nike) 9-1 wwwwwwwwwl B
Virginia Tech (Nike) 7-1 lwwwwwww B
Clemson (Nike) 7-1 wlwwwwww B
Kansas State (Nike) 6-1 wwwlwww B
Kansas (Adidas) 5-1 wwlwww
Georgia (Nike) 5-1 wwwwlw B
Notre Dame (Adidas) 10-2 wwwwwlwwwwwl B
Auburn (Under Armour) 9-2 wwwwwwllwww B
Miami OH (Adidas) 4-1 lwwww B
USC (Nike) 8-2 wwwwlwwwwl
Stanford (Nike) 7-2 lwlwwwwww B
Mississippi (Nike) 7-2 wlwwwwlww
Purdue (Nike) 9-3 lwwwlwlwwwww
Virginia (Nike) 3-1 lwww
Wisconsin (Adidas) 9-3 wwwwwwlllwww B
LSU (Nike) 8-3 wwwwllwwwlw B
BYU (Nike) 5-2 llwwwww B
South Florida (Under Armour) 5-2 wwwllww B
Northwestern (Adidas) 7-3 wwwwwwllwl B
Penn State (Nike) 8-4 wllwlwwwwlww B
Florida (Nike) 6-3 wlwlwwlww B
Buffalo (Nike) 2-1 lww
Eastern Michigan (Adidas) 2-1 lww
Marshall (Nike) 2-1 lww
UAB (Nike) 2-1 lww
Bowling Green (Adidas) 2-1 wlw
Middle Tennessee (Nike) 2-1 wlw B
Western Michigan (Adidas) 2-1 wlw
Maryland (Under Armour) 4-2 lwwwwl B
Wyoming (Nike) 2-1 wwl
Vanderbilt (Nike) 3-2 llwww
Baylor (Nike) 3-2 wwwll B
Alabama (Nike) 6-5 wlwwwlllwwl B
NC State (Adidas) 4-4 wlllwlww B
Arizona State (Nike) 2-2 lwlw
Iowa State (Nike) 3-3 wllwlw
Army (Nike) 1-1 lw B
Colorado State (Russell) 1-1 lw
Hawaii (Under Armour) 1-1 lw B
New Mexico (Nike) 1-1 lw
Houston (Nike) 2-2 wllw
Ohio (Russell) 2-2 lwwl B
Arkansas State (Adidas) 1-1 wl
San Diego State (Nike) 1-1 wl B
Southern Mississippi (Nike) 1-1 wl B
Troy (Adidas) 1-1 wl B
California (Nike) 3-3 wwllwl
Illinois (Nike) 6-6 wlwllwwlwwll B
Florida State (Nike) 5-5 llwwwwlwll B
Northern Illinois (Adidas) 2-3 llwwl B
Navy (Nike) 2-3 wwlll B
Texas A&M (Adidas) 2-3 wwlll B
TCU (Nike) 3-5 lllwlwwl B
Connecticut (Nike) 3-5 wllwllwl B
Washington (Nike) 3-5 llwwlwll B
Rutgers (Nike) 2-4 lwlllw
Arkansas (Nike) 3-6 lllllwwwl B
Kentucky (Nike) 2-4 llwlwl B
Oregon State (Nike) 2-4 wwllll
Texas (Nike) 3-7 lwlllllwlw
Arizona (Nike) 3-7 wlwlllllwl B
Georgia Tech (Russell) 2-5 lwwllll B
Indiana (Adidas) 3-8 wlwwlllllll
Nevada (Nike) 1-3 lllw B
Air Force (Nike) 1-3 wlll B
Temple (Under Armour) 1-3 wlll
Oklahoma State (Nike) 2-6 lwllwlll B
North Carolina (Nike) 2-6 lwlwllll B
Central Florida (Nike) 1-4 lllwl B
Boise State (Nike) 1-6 wllllll B
Minnesota (Nike) 1-11 lllllllllwll
Michigan (Adidas) 1-11 lllllwllllll B
Florida International (Adidas) 0-1 l B
Louisiana-Monroe (Adidas) 0-1 l
North Texas (Under Armour) 0-1 l
San Jose State (Nike) 0-1 l
UNLV (Nike) 0-1 l
Utah State (Nike) 0-1 l
Louisiana-Lafayette (Russell) 0-2 ll
Tulsa (Nike) 0-2 ll B
UTEP (Nike) 0-2 ll B
Colorado (Nike) 0-3 lll
Akron (Adidas) 0-4 llll
Ball State (Nike) 0-4 llll
Central Michigan (Adidas) 0-4 llll
Texas Tech (Under Armour) 0-5 lllll B
Toledo (Under Armour) 0-5 lllll B
Boston College (Under Armour) 0-6 llllll B
Utah (Under Armour) 0-6 llllll B
Wake Forest (Nike) 0-6 llllll
Missouri (Nike) 0-7 lllllll B
Cincinnati (Adidas) 0-8 llllllll
Oregon (Nike) 0-8 llllllll B
West Virginia (Nike) 0-8 llllllll B
Miami FL (Nike) 0-9 lllllllll B
Mississippi State (Adidas) 0-9 lllllllll B
South Carolina (Under Armour) 0-11 lllllllllll B
Michigan State (Nike) 0-12 llllllllllll B
New Mexico State 0-0

2010 FASHION CHAMPIONSHIP SUBDIVISION STANDINGS AS OF DEC 15
TEAM (BRAND) W-L WEEK-BY-WEEK
Arkansas-Pine Bluff (Russell) 2-0 ww
Southern (Russell) 2-0 ww
Appalachian State (Nike) 1-0 w
Bethune-Cookman (Russell) 1-0 w
Brown (unknown) 1-0 w
Harvard (Nike) 1-0 w
Massachusetts (Adidas) 1-0 w
New Hampshire (Nike) 1-0 w
Northern Colorado (New Balance) 1-0 w
Penn (Nike) 1-0 w
Samford (Russell) 1-0 w
South Carolina State (Russell) 1-0 w
South Dakota (Nike) 1-0 w
Southern Illinois (Under Armour) 1-0 w
Tennessee State (Adidas) 1-0 w
Tuskegee (Russell) 1-0 w
Alabama State (Russell) 0-1 l
Alcorn State (Russell) 0-1 l
Austin Peay (Nike) 0-1 l
Dartmouth (Nike) 0-1 l
Delaware (Under Armour) 0-1 l
Delaware State (Russell) 0-1 l
Eastern Illinois (New Balance) 0-1 l
Florida A&M (Russell) 0-1 l
Georgia State (Adidas) 0-1 l
Grambling State (Russell) 0-1 l
Illinois State (Nike) 0-1 l
Jacksonville State (Adidas) 0-1 l
McNeese State (Under Armour) 0-1 l
Morgan State (Russell) 0-1 l
North Carolina A&T (Russell) 0-1 l
Prairie View A&M (Russell) 0-1 l
Princeton (Nike) 0-1 l
Towson (Under Armour) 0-1 l
Villanova (Nike) 0-1 l
Western Illinois (Adidas) 0-1 l
Yale (Nike) 0-1 l
Youngstown State (Under Armour) 0-1 l

COLLEGE FOOTBALL BRAND STANDINGS AS OF DEC 15
Adidas 94-75
Nike 237-226
New Balance 1-1
Russell 14-18
Under Armour 21-48
unknown 1-0

NHL FASHION STANDINGS 2010-2011 AS OF DEC 15
TEAM W-L GAME-BY-GAME
Philadelphia Flyers 5-0 wwwww
Chicago Blackhawks 3-0 www
Florida Panthers 1-0 w
New York Islanders 1-0 w
Vancouver Canucks 1-0 w
Detroit Red Wings 25-3 wlwwwwwwwllwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
Boston Bruins 4-1 wwwlw
New York Rangers 2-1 wwl
Dallas Stars 1-1 lw
Tampa Bay Lightning 1-1 lw
Minnesota Wild 2-2 lwwl
Carolina Hurricanes 1-1 wl
St Louis Blues 2-2 wlwl
Calgary Flames 1-2 lwl
Columbus Blue Jackets 1-2 wll
Atlanta Thrashers 0-1 l
Edmonton Oilers 0-1 l
New Jersey Devils 0-1 l
Pittsburgh Penguins 0-1 l
Buffalo Sabres 0-2 ll
Montreal Canadiens 0-2 ll
Anaheim Ducks 0-3 lll
Los Angeles Kings 0-3 lll
Nashville Predators 0-3 lll
Phoenix Coyotes 0-4 llll
Washington Capitals 0-4 llll
Colorado Avalanche 0-5 lllll
San Jose Sharks 0-5 lllll
Ottawa Senators 0-0
Toronto Maple Leafs 0-0

NBA FASHION STANDINGS 2010-2011 AS OF DEC 15
TEAM W-L GAME-BY-GAME
Utah Jazz 4-0 wwww
Cleveland Cavaliers 2-0 ww
New York Knicks 2-0 ww
San Antonio Spurs 2-0 ww
New Jersey Nets 1-0 w
Boston Celtics 8-1 wwwlwwwww
Los Angeles Lakers 5-1 wwwlww
Golden State Warriors 4-1 wwwlw
Denver Nuggets 3-1 wwwl
Chicago Bulls 7-4 wlwwlwwlwlw
Detroit Pistons 15-9 lllwwlwwwllwwllwwwlwwwww
Phoenix Suns 3-2 llwww
Oklahoma City Thunder 3-2 lwwwl
Memphis Grizzlies 1-1 wl
Portland Trail Blazers 2-4 wllllw
Atlanta Hawks 1-3 llwl
Sacramento Kings 1-3 llwl
Houston Rockets 1-3 lwll
Miami Heat 2-6 lwllwlll
Orlando Magic 1-7 wlllllll
Milwaukee Bucks 0-1 l
New Orleans Hornets 0-1 l
Philadelphia 76ers 0-1 l
Toronto Raptors 0-1 l
Charlotte Bobcats 0-2 ll
Minnesota Timberwolves 0-2 ll
Dallas Mavericks 0-3 lll
Washington Wizards 0-4 llll
Los Angeles Clippers 0-5 lllll
Indiana Pacers 0-0