Thursday, October 28, 2004

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP (OCT 22-25)

Had to skip Mutz last week, so this edition's just a tad truncated.

FRIDAY, OCTOBER 22, MUGZIE'S, 16 SONGS

NEW--Beyond The Gray Sky--311--I'm stupid. I forgot how the song goes. Then again, as Steve Dahl would say, "Set the bar low and then keep jumping over it."
NEW--Midnight Confessions--The Grass Roots--Oldie but a goodie. Decided to have one of my cherry-oke popping fests.
NEW--Under My Wheels--Alice Cooper--One of the driving songs I picked out after the JA Grand Prix.
NEW--Brick--Ben Folds Five--Not bad. It's either really low or really high. Both of which I can handle.
NEW--Drive--Incubus--And that completes my "Drive" trilogy, along with "Drive" by the Cars and "Drive" by R.E.M. My mid-range served me well.
Gonna Be Some Changes Made--Bruce Hornsby--Had to try it again. Damn shortened version. Not easy.
NEW--A Hard Day's Night--The Beatles--Heard someone else do it weeks ago, it's in a lower key than the original, low enough that I did okay.
Hole Hearted--Extreme--In my range, but tough to breathe through.
NEW--I Drink Alone--George Thorogood--Kept my Smirnoff Twisted in hand as I sang. Changed the last verse: "Well I had some fun with a lady friend | But then she up and ran off | So now I spend my weekends | With my pal Pierre Smirnoff | And we drink alone..."
NEW--You Don't Bring Me Flowers--Neil Diamond & Barbra Streisand--Duet with Tina. My Neil is right on, Tina's Barbra is right on. Not bad.
It's Been Awhile--Staind--With my mid-range clicking, I can now throw this into the mix with "Outside" for some Staind variety. As for "So Far Away" and "Fade"...those both scare me.

(Now, before we move on, I must warn you: Prepare to be shocked and stunned. Hell hath frozen over. Are you all sitting down?)

NEW--Picture--Kid Rock & Sheyrl Crow--Yes, I know. You must all be flabbergasted. But I knew Tina could do her part well, and since Kid Rock can't actually sing, my part was way easy. For once this song didn't suck at karaoke. But still I felt kinda stupid. Not to mention more than a tad ashamed. But it's one more tune under my belt. Besides, shocking people is what I do. Fuck, I even shocked myself this time. Hey, gotta do the unexpected now and then, keep you folks on your toes. What will I do next? "Heart Of Glass"? "Redneck Woman"? "Quando Quando Quando"? You just never know!
NEW--Me And You And A Dog Named Boo--Lobo--Perfectly in my range. Nailed it.
One More Minute--Weird Al Yankovic--More women in the crowd than last week. Went okay. However, the more I thought about it...
You Don't Love Me Anymore--Weird Al Yankovic--...the more I realized this one would be even better to work the female part of the crowd with. And it was. The room's too big though. Can't wait to work the crowd at Mutz with it.
She's So High--Tal Bachman--Getting better at it. Needs a little more work. I want to keep this in my regular rotation.

MONDAY, OCTOBER 25, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 4 SONGS
NEW--I Hold Your Hand In Mine--Tom Lehrer--I got away with my a capella Halloween tune. Not a lot of people there though, so it kinda fell on deaf ears.
Surrender--Cheap Trick--I somehow managed to not sound like Neil Diamond this time.
NEW--Big Ten Inch--Aerosmith--Was in a playful mood. Predictably I caught some ribbing from D&M.
NEW--Punk Rock Girl--The Dead Milkmen--Playful again. Fun one to do, but I flubbed a couple of lines.

Coming up: Halloween weekend. Gonna hafta do "Monster Mash", "Purple People Eater", whatever other Halloween songs I can think of. Saturday at Mutz could get interesting, what with costumes and all. Perhaps I'll be performing "Sweet Transvestite"? Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Thursday, October 21, 2004

Before we get to the W.K.R., I gotta say...WAY TO GO, RED SOX! Coming back from a 3-0 hole to knock off the hated Yankees! I am pleasantly shocked and stunned!

Now, on to business...

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP (OCTOBER 15-18)

FRIDAY, OCTOBER 15, MUGZIE'S, 21 SONGS
You read right, 21 songs in one night, shattering my old record of 12. For a solid two hours it was just me and Doug, back and forth, tag-team singing, with a couple of duets thrown in for variety.

NEW--She's So High--Tal Bachman--Heard it on the radio, had to try it.
NEW--1985--Bowling For Soup--Heard it in-between singers, had to try it. I'm just too damn suggestible.
Oh Pretty Woman--Roy Orbison--Gosh I like doing this one. I think the growl could lead to great things for me. The chicks dig it.
Away From The Sun--3 Doors Down--Another in-between song. You know, if I accidentally hear the Spice Girls one of these days, I'm doomed.
NEW--Better Man--Pearl Jam--Sending this one out to all my female friends.
Behind Blue Eyes--The Who--I hear the Limp Bizkit version in-between, but I prefer to do the Who version. Well, actually I do throw in "L-I-M-P...whatever" at one point.
NEW--Crocodile Rock--Elton John--I knew if I could do Bennie & The Jets, I could do this one. I was right. Dunno if I'll do it again anytime soon though. The la-la-la shit at the end gets annoying.
Babylon--David Gray--Been meaning to do this one more often. Not sure if I like the short version though.
NEW--Generation Landslide--Alice Cooper--Just because I like to throw in a sort-of-obscure tune once in a while.
If I Had $1,000,000--Barenaked Ladies--Duet with Doug. We do good harmony on it.
Dock Of The Bay--Otis Redding--I do it well, I like it, but I could do without having to do the whistling part at the end.
It's No Good--Arthur Kill/Depeche Mode--This time I added the AK-style primal scream at the end.
1979--Smashing Pumpkins--The 1996 SOTY. My Billy Corgan is right on.
One More Minute--Weird Al Yankovic--Tried to work the crowd this time, but there were only 2 or 3 ladies in the crowd, and I think it best if I refrain from turning it into a gay number. At least not in a str8 bar.
Dixie Rose Deluxe's Honky Tonk, Feed Store, Gun Shop, Used Car, Beer, Bait, BBQ, Barber Shop, Laundromat--Trent Willmon--Gotta love not having to look at the words.
NEW--You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin'--The Righteous Brothers--Duet with Doug. Pretty damn good for our first try. Harmony was excellent. Once we work out our solo parts, we could nail this one every time.
Outside (live acoustic version)--Aaron Lewis & Fred Durst--I dig on it. Nuff said.
Sloop John B--The Beach Boys--Felt like experimenting, went low at first, tried some mid-range here and there, and ended in my ridiculously-high voice. Think I'll stick to low from now on.
NEW--She Hates Me--Puddle Of Mudd--Saved it for the last half hour in case I killed my voice on it. I didn't, my mid-range held out.
Float On--Modest Mouse--After we finished, I was waiting for my cab, watching a couple of nicely-built chubby gals play pool. One of them complimented me on this song, and I was possibly on the verge of something very interesting, when the stupid cab showed up and I had to leave. Lesson learned: wait a while before calling the cab!
Mother--Pink Floyd--I must remember to take note of the reverb level so I get it just right every time.

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 16, MUTZ, 1 SONG
My first solo flight running the show! Woohoo! Funny how things balance out...Friday I did 21 songs and we had 7 singers. Saturday I did 1 song and ended up having to manage 48 singers on the night. But I was not flustered or overwhelmed in the least. I simply stuck to the usual formula, got everyone in at least once, and still had fun. I believe I proved myself worthy of running the show whenever needed in future. I was professional, I acted normal for the most part, and Helper Monkey stayed in his cage. (The highlight was when I had about a dozen people singing "Bohemian Rhapsody". They weren't exactly all in sync with each other or the tune, so I began 'conducting' them. Worked very well. It was magical. Michael Kamen, eat your heart out!)

Away From The Sun--3 Doors Down--Got in the first song of the night, but my orders were to take myself out of the queue once I had 10 singers, which happened before I could get to a second song. So this was it.

MONDAY, OCTOBER 18, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 4 SONGS
Only 3 other singers during my short appearance, so I made the most of it.

You Don't Love Me Anymore--Weird Al Yankovic--I wish I always had an old used guitar to smash at the end of the song whenever I do this one. As it is I have to make do with a heavy-metal-type primal scream.
Oh Pretty Woman--Roy Orbison--See Friday.
NEW--Turn The Page--Bob Seger--Nailed it. Didn't think I would.
Sundown--Gordon Lightfoot--As soon as I walked in, some guy yelled "Ducksoup!" Seems I'm gaining a reputation. :) For whatever reason the guy also yelled "Sundown", so I assumed it was a request. I'm always open to requests, BTW, should any of my readers come to hear me sing. If I know it, I'll do it!

Song I want to sing: "I Hold Your Hand In Mine" by Tom Lehrer. A good song for Halloween season. But will they let me go a capella? You know me, if I can get away with it...

Monday, October 18, 2004

T-MINUS 18 DAYS UNTIL THE NEXT EPISODE OF ALF'S HIT TALK SHOW

Apparently the pilot episode was such a hit that TV Land has ordered 6 more episodes! They will air Fridays at 11pm starting November 5th. (Granted this will probably curtail my Friday night karaoke-ing, but I have my priorities.)

PS: A CORECTION

Aparently, some of you didn't scour the archives thoroughly enough to know that the "Spot The Typoe" challenge was discontinued long ago.

Saturday, October 16, 2004

HOW MANY MEMBERS OF THE BUSH ADMINISTRATION DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?

Answer: 10

1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed
2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed
3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb
4. One to tell the nations of the world that they are either for changing the light bulb or for darkness
5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the new light bulb
6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a step ladder under the banner: Lightbulb Change Accomplished
7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how Bush was literally in the dark
8. One to viciously smear #7
9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light-bulb-changing policy all along
And finally...
10. One to confuse Americans about the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the country

Friday, October 15, 2004

BEST BAND NAMES PLAYING THE TOLEDO AREA THIS WEEK (OCT 15-21)

Don't Ask--tonight & Saturday at Anchor Inn
Glass Bead Game--Saturday at Mickey Finn's Pub
Hugh Rock.com--Saturday at Papa's Tavern
Flickerstick--Monday at Magic Bag
Clumsy Lovers--Tuesday at Mickey Finn's Pub
The Bamboo Kids--Thursday at Mickey Finn's Pub
Lame-o--Thursday at Mickey Finn's Pub

Thursday, October 14, 2004

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP (OCT. 8-11)

Note: I've compiled a virtually complete list of all the songs I've ever sung at karaoke. The link is at right under "Picks To Click".

FRIDAY, MUGZIE'S, 8 SONGS

Evenflow, Pearl Jam--Still coming down off the PJ show.
Bittersweet Symphony, The Verve--Even the shortened version is too long.
Great Balls Of Fire, Jerry Lee Lewis--On my slip I wrote simply "Great Balls".
Rain, The Beatles--Because it was raining when I arrived. Gotta get some more Beatles tunes under my belt.
Hunger Strike, Temple Of The Dog--Just as I thought, I need a second singer in future to do the Chris Cornell parts.
I'm Your Captain/Closer To Home, Grand Funk Railroad--One of those songs I could always sing perfectly in the car. At karaoke...(shrug)
Volcano, Jimmy Buffett--Done as a shout-out to Mt. St. Helen's.
Vasectomy, Steve Dahl--Someone did "Close To You", so I decided to take a run at the classic Dahl parody thereof.

SATURDAY, MUTZ, 10 SONGS

Inside Out, Eve 6--Tough to breathe through, but otherwise okay.
Vaseline, Stone Temple Pilots--Exercising the mid-range. My Scott Weiland is right on. Can't wait to do some Velvet Revolver.
Oh Pretty Woman, Roy Orbison--Recycled from someone else. Surprised even myself by nailing this, including the growl.
It's No Good, Depeche Mode--I sort of combined the DM version with the Arthur Kill version. I was very happy with the result. Shoulda done this months ago.
Shaving Cream, Benny Bell--Took back my comedic throne from my friendly archrival Sam, who was exceptionally drunk.
Everytime, Britney Spears--Sam had the nerve to put in "My Happy Ending" by Avril Lavigne. Bastid! But I gave him the go-ahead. But being way too drunk, he sucked big time. So I followed with my Britney and put him in his place.
Behind Blue Eyes, The Who--Heard the Limp Bizkit version in between singers. I prefer the Who version. Has always been one of my best.
Hole Hearted, Extreme--I was a bit worried, but my mid-range didn't let me down.
Float On, Modest Mouse--Dancin' Sarah (Sam's GF) stole this one from me weeks ago. She was absent this week, so I took it back, and nailed it. Mine mine mine! Crowd pleaser.
Sweet Emotion, Aerosmith--Tough to hold the long notes, but the rest of it is too easy. Another crowd pleaser.

MONDAY, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 2 SONGS

I Don't Like Mondays, The Boomtown Rats--Well, duh. Painfully obvious choice. Just needs a bit of work and I'll nail it.
One More Minute, Weird Al Yankovic--Micki requested it, one of her faves. I gotta keep this and the other Weird Al ballad in my regular rotation. Especially when they're relevant.

Woohoo! There's a good chance they might let me run the Saturday show at Mutz this week! Keep the body parts of your choice crossed for me, campers!

Friday, October 08, 2004

BEST BAND NAMES PLAYING THE TOLEDO AREA THIS WEEK (OCT 8-14)

Chili Cat--tonight & Saturday at Sodbuster
Don't Ask--tonight & Saturday at Lucky Louie's
Red Wanting Blue--Thursday at Headliners
Streetlamps for Spotlights--Saturday at Mickey Finn's Pub
Tangerine Trousers--tonight at Mickey Finn's Pub

Thursday, October 07, 2004

P.S.

Actually, now that I recall, I had an even weirder hallucination last week: I turned on the TV and saw Herman Munster debating...um, let's see, it was either Alfred E. Neuman or a chimp, I'm not sure.

P.P.S.

NASCAR, you are so full of SHIT!

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

I AM THE LIZARD KING!

Wow, that sure was some bitchin' acid I dropped yesterday. You folks wouldn't believe the wild hallucination I had last night. I was sure I saw a debate on TV between John Ritter and Bob Hope! Far out, man.

Tuesday, October 05, 2004

WEEKLY KARAOKE RECAP (OCT 1-4)

FRIDAY, MUGZIE'S, 7 SONGS

NEW--Basket Case, Green Day
Another slip recycled from someone else.

NEW--I Miss You, Blink 182
Another song I kept hearing in between singers. Sometimes one of those songs just out and out haunts me until I sing it myself. Needs work, I forgot to start out low on the first verse. (And I forgot to sing in that weird Blink 182 accent. How the fuck could I forget that?)

NEW--Peace Train, Cat Stevens
Fortunately they haven't deported his stuff from the playlist. I think I do very good on C.S. If only they had some of his tunes from "Harold And Maude". (A bit of shamelessly self-centered trivia: This slip now shares with "One Thing" the honor of flanking my slips for "Outside". As if you care.)

NEW--Dixie Rose Deluxe's Honky Tonk, Feed Store, Gun Shop, Used Car, Beer, Bait, BBQ, Barber Shop, Laundromat, Trent Willmon
Yeehah! Nailed it! And didn't look at the monitor while singing the title either! Not even at the end when he adds "tractor parts, eight-tracks, trampolines, tux rental, groceries, video, post office, taxidermy" to it! (Granted, I had to peek once in a while during the verses, but those are tough to memorize.)

NEW--Cover Of "Rolling Stone", Dr. Hook
A duet with Edgar. He insisted I take the first verse, which I suspect was just so he could do the extremely-low-voiced second verse, which he nailed. I did good on my parts considering I've never practiced it.

Dare To Be Stupid, Weird Al Yankovic
For some reason there were a lot of 'stupid' songs being sung that night, so I tossed this into the rotation and sent it out to George W. Bush.

She Drives Like Crazy, Weird Al Yankovic
Doug should know by now that whenever he does "She Drives Me Crazy" I'm going to have to follow it with this one. The track gets totally fucked up during the instrumental though, so I have to remember to compensate for it in future.

SATURDAY, MUTZ, 1 SONG

Daughter, Pearl Jam
And so by the time I walked all the way from the Sports Arena to Mutz, I only had time to get in one song. Two others ahead of me in the queue did "Alive" and "Jeremy" so I had to go with my third choice.

MONDAY, SOUTHWYCK LOUNGE, 6 SONGS
Ended up not having to go to work, so reeled off a half-dozen Pearl Jammers:

Given To Fly (NEW), Alive, I Am Mine, Not For You, Daughter, Jeremy
The new one, GTF, was the only one that worried me, but I pretty much nailed the high parts. My mid-range is really starting to come in nicely. Put me in enough of a comfort zone that I breezed through the rest.

I think I'm going to start classifying my two groups of slips like baseball cards: "Need-It" and "Got-It". So here are some of the newest Need-Its:
Better Man, Pearl Jam; Evenflow, Pearl Jam; Hail Hail, Pearl Jam; Hunger Strike, Temple Of The Dog; Vaseline, Stone Temple Pilots
Am I getting overconfident, or what? Hello, mid-range!
Crocodile Rock, Elton John
Recycled from someone else. If I can do "Bennie & The Jets", I can do this.
Oh Pretty Woman, Roy Orbison
Recycled from someone else. More overconfidence? Maybe. But I can do the growl.
My Cellmate Thinks I'm Sexy, Cletus T. Judd
Just so Doug won't have to sing it anymore.
Over The Rainbow, Judy Garland
Why not? Why the hell not?! Give me one good reason why not! What's that you say? Because it'll be embarrassing? Ha ha ha! You fools! Did you forget who you're talking to?! Besides, if I get it just right I could make any one of you downright weepy.
I've Been Everywhere, Hank Snow
Forget "It's The End Of The World As We Know It". Forget "Dixie Rose Deluxe's Honky Tonk, Feed Store, Gun Shop, Used Car, Beer, Bait, BBQ, Barber Shop, Tractor Parts, Eight-Tracks, Trampolines, Tux Rental, Groceries, Video, Post Office, Taxidermy, Laundromat". Forget all the others. "I've Been Everywhere" is THE ultimate karaoke challenge!

Monday, October 04, 2004

GEAK RADIO TOP 40 (week ending Oct. 2)

Obviously the Pearl Jam show Saturday had a huge effect on the countdown. Last year's SOTY tops the chart once again, and the 1993 SOTY winner also made the cut at #19.

1. Thumbing My Way--Pearl Jam (last week: #18)
2. Rockin' In The Free World--Neil Young & Pearl Jam (last week: not ranked)
3. Take Me Out--Franz Ferdinand (last week: nr)
4. Dixie Rose Deluxe's Honky Tonk, Feed Store, Gun Shop, Used Car, Beer, Bait, BBQ, Barber Shop, Laundromat--Trent Willmon (last week: nr)
5. Chicken Out--Gomez (last week: tied-#1)
6. Staring At The Sun--Simple Kid (last week: tied-#1)
7. The Long Road--Pearl Jam with Neil Young (last week: nr)
8. Are You Lonesome Tonight--Sam Kinison (last week: #30)
9. I Miss You--Blink 182 (last week: nr)
10. Downtown--Neil Young & Pearl Jam (last week: nr)
11. Silence--Gomez (last week: #3)
12. Average Man--Simple Kid (last week: #5)
13. Nothing Is Wrong--Gomez (last week: #10)
14. Here And Now--Letters To Cleo (last week: nr)
15. On Top Of You--Trey Parker (last week: #13)
16. Breakups Breakdowns--Simple Kid (last week: #6)
17. Where Ya Going--Gomez (last week: #9)
18. Drugs--Simple Kid (last week: #7)
19. Jeremy--Pearl Jam (last week: nr)
20. Truck On--Simple Kid (last week: #4)
21. Harvest Moon--Neil Young (last week: nr)
22. Mad World--Michael Andrews featuring Gary Jules (last week: #8)
23. My Happy Ending--Avril Lavigne (last week: #12)
24. It's No Good--Depeche Mode (last week: #31)
25. Hail, Hail--Pearl Jam (last week: nr)
26. Somewhere Out There--Our Lady Peace (last week: nr)
27. Do One--Gomez (last week: nr)
28. All Of My Life--Todd Snider (last week: #16)
29. Wishlist--Pearl Jam (last week: nr)
30. I Want A Fat Babe--Snackstreet Boys (last week: #15)
31. Supertramps And Superstars--Simple Kid (last week: #21)
32. Given To Fly--Pearl Jam (last week: nr)
33. Float On--Modest Mouse (last week: nr)
34. Everytime--Britney Spears (last week: nr)
35. Send The Pain Below--Chevelle (last week: nr)
36. Commuter--Simple Kid (last week: #25)
37. Good To See You--Neil Young (last week: nr)
38. Gonna Be Some Changes Made--Bruce Hornsby (last week: #14)
39. Cold As Ice--Mat Dusk (last week: #33)
40. Fat Bottomed Girls--Hayseed Dixie (last week: #11)